Rudolf Steiner's weekly meditations
soul-calendar-09

Artistic Response

Here is my artistic response to this week's Soul-Calendar-09 meditation verse by Rudolf Steiner. For a brief introduction to this project, please see my first couple of posts on the blog pages. See also calendarofthesoul.net where you can see a range of translations into English and other languages. By the way, I am not in any way suggesting that my translations are preferable to any of the published translations. But I don't want to infringe any copyright, hence I am offering my own, literal, translations here.

Soul-Calendar-09 meditation

Rudolf Steiner's original soul-calendar-09 meditation
June 2-8
Vergessend meine Willenseigenheit
Erfüllet Weltenwärme sommerkündend
Mir Geist und Seelenwesen;
Im Licht mich zu verlieren
Gebietet mir das Geistesschauen,
Und kraftvoll kündet Ahnung mir:
Verliere dich, um dich zu finden.

My translation
Forgetting my will’s-own-hood
Fills world-warmth summer-heralding
My spirit and soul-being;
In light myself to lose
Commands me the spirit-beholding,
And powerfully announces premonition to me:
Lose you, so as you to find.

My interpretation of the soul-calendar-09 meditation

I'm forgetting my own will and let the warmth of the world engulf my spirit and my soul. I give myself fully (but with the verse in hand, also consciously) over to the forces that draw me out of myself and entice me to spread myself out into the flowing warmth around me. Even so, I can still clearly see that the world demands of me to lose myself in the light, that is, it demands that in my feeling I lose myself in light. The spirit-beholding may be my own developing ability to become conscious of how my soul, my feeling life, works and weaves and dances with the ever-changing forces in the natural world, the weather, the atmosphere, the planets and stars. So this spirit-beholding speaks to me, not directly in clear thoughts, but through a kind of sixth sense. The German word Ahnung is a kind of pre-sensing, a hunch, although it could also simply mean 'idea', as in 'you have no idea!'. So I have an inkling or hunch that this is what is happening to me now and that I should not fight these dynamics, just observe them and trust, fully trust, that in losing myself, in allowing to lose myself in the warmth and the light, I will in time also be able to find myself. I find this just such a wonderful picture, which makes sense yet is seemingly also a contradiction. How can I find myself, if I have lost myself? But if put the other way around it might make some more sense: How could I find myself, if I had not first lost myself? If I already had myself, without having to go and look for myself, then would it be possible for me to be free or even to be conscious of myself? So this whole movement in my relationship to the world is also a movement, as always, in my relationship to myself. Through this and with the help of these verses, I can become more sensitive, more alert, more conscious of how my soul and spirit are affected by the ever-changing world and learn to know myself truly as a spiritual being within a spiritual world.

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